Tuesday, July 15, 2008

The Breakfast Conspiracy

I'm not normally a breakfast eater, but recently, upon the insistence that this is the "healthiest" and "most important" meal of the day, I ventured to add breakfast into my daily routine. The result? A very uncomfortable, bloated and unhappy me. What's worse, is that I am ravenous for the rest of the day. Why is this? Perhaps it's the magical starting of my metabolism which should help me in the long run, but truthfully, it doesn't. I spent my life not eating breakfast and being perfectly comfortable... Why is it that those that advocate a healthy lifestyle insist on this unhappy venture to eat when one is not hungry at all? After some thought on the matter I have decided that it is all a conspiracy. They tell you to eat breakfast, thus you eat more throughout the day, thus you obsess about how much your eating and think that you need to go on a diet because all of a sudden you're gaining weight. So you buy a diet book, and what does it tell you? Eat breakfast. And thus begins the cycle once more.

Breakfast is why the world is fat.

The End.




1 comment:

Brittney Galloway said...

HAHAHA, I like your conspiracy idea.

Unfortunately, I have to agree with all of the health people. It's just "wakes up," your digestive system earlier.

I find a glass of milk and half a banana does it for me though. Too much food makes me gross in the morning.