I have become such a skeptic. I have become someone who cares way too much about what others think of her. To my sister, missions is a joke. She thinks it's just a free plane ticket that someone recieves in order that they can brainwash the world. She thinks that the Bible is partially a history book, partially fantasy.
I used to care so much about the task that God had appointed me: to know Him and to make Him known.
Now I care way too much about what my sister thinks. For instance: Seminary.
The door has been opened for me to go to seminary free of charge. I feel as though this is an opportunity that should not be taken for granted, but everytime I think about going to seminary, I think of of what Rebecca will say when she finds out. Or about what my friends who are getting "real" masters degrees will say. This all came to my immediate attention on Thursday, and what do I do, I completely disregarded what I had read in God's Word that very same morning.
Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.
It is natural for one to desire the approval of their friends and family, but did not Jesus say
no one who has left home or wife or brothers or parents or children for the sake of the kingdom of God will fail to receive many times as much in this age and, in the age to come, eternal life...
Aren't we supposed to take up our cross and follow him?
Maybe I should work on this... for now, I must do curfew checks... sorry to cut it short...